 For
A Fistful of Mercenaries
Zovko took out a pack of cigarettes and offered me one.
"Thank you, no." I poured the rest of the bottled water into my
glass and watched the 5 o’clock crowd hustle past our outdoor table
at the café next to the firms building.
"Right. Corporate guy. Don’t smoke, drink Pellegrino, golf on
Saturdays… " >>
read more
 For
Alan: In his book, a Social Contract is what you negotiate with a
hooker
"Rebecca, when my 10:30 shows up, just point him to - "
I heard the snicker before I saw the poster. I crossed myself.
Twice. Behind the receptionist, high on the wall for every client to
see...
"ALAN!" >>
read more
 Just
like every day on the 14th floor by Dana
"Your 3:30 is waiting in the conference room." Brad emptied the mini
bottle into his coffee and tossed the way too small glass into the
recycling bin. "Very good." Brad nodded at the
receptionist, removed the small paperback from the file folder
marked Duces Tecum and walked out of his office, making a left and
putting half the firms associates between him and the conference
room.
>> read more
 Time,
talk and tear gas by Dana
"He told Denny your Hail Mary pass saved his ass."
"Sounds like the beginning of a dirty limerick." I smirked at
Shirley. She clinked my beer with her wine and we both let the
alcohol soften the ragged edges of an afternoon spent in a Crane,
Poole & Schmidt International meeting.
>> read more
 Sacrifice
for the Law
"It's not pretty, but it's our legal system. And it works. It's
like sausage: no one wants to see it made, and it will eventually
destroy your heart, not to mention the sudden weight gain. Put some
pants on, America. The Truth is knocking at the door."
Brad clicked the remote for his office flat screen, deleting the
bear-hating journalist. It was midnight. Crane and Schmidt had long
since gone home. Poole, he could only guess, was somewhere
blissfully happy and pantsless.
>> read more
 "The
Inside Man"
by Dana
"On the house."
"Why's that?" All other mornings, the barista made a point to eye
his tip cup when handing Brad his change. "In fact – "He pointed a
finger to Brad's lapel as he switched to announcer mode, addressing
his caffeine groupies in the small shop in the lobby of the firms
building. " – you're not paying for another cup of coffee this
year." A promotional smile tried to overshadow the fact there were
only seven days remaining in his offer. "That kid you rescued.
You're Charles Bronson, man. You're a hero. Hero's never pay. That'd
be bad karma."
>> read more
![Brad Chase: Permanent Failure [Letter to ten-year-old Brad]](icons/brad-sf-bust3-blue.jpg) Permanent
failure. Error: Sport unknown.
by Dana
3:27 a.m.
It felt like 90 degrees in the dark Boston brownstone, but Brad
could hear the frigid wind shaking the window. It was the sound of
Tito's fists banging the backseat window. It was the sound of Billy,
thirty years ago, pounding the inside door of the shelter deep in
the Rock Creek Park woods. Brad opened the window, letting the
icy pain punish him as it should have every day since Billy, then
pumped out fifty push-ups on the hardwood floor.
>> read more
 One Minute with...
Bradley Chase, J.D.
Junior Partner
Crane, Poole & Schmidt
Boston
Massachusetts Law Review: Do you consider yourself to be a people
person?
Chase: Without question. Whatever your politics, we all bleed
red, white and blue. People first.
Massachusetts Law Review: What do you dislike about your position
as an attorney?
Chase: De-hiring. While unpleasant, the task falls on the
ranking authority ...
>> read more
 Gratitude [for Bradley, vanquisher of clowns] A story by Carolyn &
Dana
Alan is certain that, except in very specific instances (those concerning
Denny), gratitude serves no purpose but to make him feel uncomfortable.
Gratitude in itself always seems an inadequate reward for any act
eliciting it and so Alan’s left with the restless feeling of needing to do
something. As though he’s allowing some potential to go to waste.
>> read more
 I can't forgive him: a Brad Chase ficlet by Dana
[excerpt] The story wasn't linear. More of a confession and I fell back
into the cadence of the young Marine lieutenant fully dedicated to our
mission in Desert Shield. It was February. We're told we're
moving north again. We'll be back clearing some of the area we passed
yesterday. There's radio chatter that the house where ten Iraqi troops...
>> read more
"Strength: a ficlet" by Brad Chase
"At 6 a.m., the boat traffic on the docks of the St. Charles was minimal.
Fog crept between the pilings and around the pier like a gray cat. Brad
kept his pace even. He'd covered the mile from his brownstone to the US
Coast Guard wharf in six minutes."
>> read more
Short ficlet by Carolyn
"Today, Alan’s under-the-table dealings consist of
drumming his fingers on the heel of his shoe"
more >>
The first time I saw Alan Shore... I didn't see the attraction
Brad obsesses, Alan enjoys himself, Lori explains and Carolina shows her
tattoo.
>> read more
 Relax
A ficlet by Nicalamity
[excerpt] He's found the company of women to be extremely relaxing; it's
an addiction of sorts that's gotten into trouble on numerous occasions,
but at this stage in his life, he doesn't mind a bit of trouble. He
admitted to Alan once that being in the company of attractive women is
arousing enough to help him think; he failed to be vulnerable enough to
admit that the presence of a female tended to soothe his otherwise weary
mind enough to provide clarity to his muddled thoughts.
"Tara, you're here late."
>> read more
"I
Am So Close: A ficlet" by Denise Bauer
"Don't let my appearance fool you. Get in my way and I'll knock you on
your ass. You see, being a lawyer who happens to be a woman is an
especially tough road to Partnership."
>> read more
|
 "That's
Easy for YOU to Say!"
by olucy, bbbeluga & paulish
Alan is squeezing a lime over something in a shallow dish. Brad enters.
Brad: Oh my god. What’s that smell?
Alan: Hello, Brad. It’s poisson cru. Evidently you didn’t help make the
Polynesian Islands safe for democracy when you were a Marine. Their
loss, I’m sure. >> read
more
 Independence Day
BL.org forum moderator olucy once again allows us to eavesdrop on a
conversation between U.S. President Denny Crane and his Chief of Staff
Alan Shore.
>> read more
[Excerpt] Chief of Staff Alan Shore: Good morning, Mr.
President. Happy Independence Day!
POTUS Denny Crane: Hell, yes! Land of the free! Home of the brave!
Alan: Indeed. How are you going to celebrate, by the way? A copy of
today’s Official Agenda was removed from my desk and I’m still trying to
get to the bottom of it.
Denny: Yes, I asked Clarence to toss it. We don’t need an Official
Agenda. Alan, I’d like to put my personal stamp on this day.
Alan: Oh, uh…really? The last time you did that you renamed everything
either Denny or Crane. If it wasn’t for a potential national uproar and
the threat of a corporate lawsuit the White House would now be known as
Denny’s.
Denny: Sounds friendlier than White House, don’t you think? The White
House is so generic, so….bland. But...Denny’s. Let’s you know who lives
there and what you’re dealing with.
Alan: Well I can’t argue with that.
Denny: Damn straight. Who do people think put the D.C. in Washington,
D.C.?
>> read more [story by olucy; icon by
godhopping]
>> read another POTUS Crane scene from Presidents Day
 "Bumped"
by Darryl the Hitman
Alan Shore: So, Denny, what are you doing?
Denny Crane: Oh, just practicing my moves.
Alan Shore: I'm sure it's clear why you're doing that but for the fun of
it, tell me anyway.
Denny Crane: Well, I've got some free time now.
Alan Shore: Free time? Aren't we supposed to be in court next week?
Denny Crane: No, man, we got bumped.
>> read more
![POTUS Denny Crane [icon by Nicalamity]](icons/Denny-POTUS-Nicalamity.jpg) "Versus"
by olucy
Chief of Staff Alan Shore: Good morning, Mr. President. Happy
President's Day.
POTUS Denny Crane: It's great having a day that is completely yours,
Alan. Y'know, other people can share your birthday. And other people can
share your anniversary. But there is no other President to share
President's Day. It's mine! And I'm going to put my own special stamp on
it. >> read
more
THE BOSTON SHAMROCK
President Crane Outlines
Historical Virtues in Shower Scandal;
Attorney General Shore comes to his Aide
By Patrick O'Rourke, Shamrock Staff Writer
Wednesday, February 25, 2009 -
Debate across the country, in politics and in the public,
continues to rage around the controversial February 19
incident in which President Denny Crane apparently gave a
confidence-boosting address to members of the Cranes White
House Beach Volleyball team - in the women's communal
showers. >>
read more
Password: The Crane, Poole & Schmidt
Edition
by bbbeluga, olucy, drsheri, melloday
Fiction: "Three Dreams, Five Women" by greensilver
"Alan's corpse is a singularly boring host..."
>> read more
 The
remark I was not supposed to hear by LJ Denise
"Yeah, Denise can be a real bitch but that's because she's sexually
repressed. I can easily fix that."
I was strolling by the break room when I overheard Garrett's remark to
Sara.
>> read more
 This
is so the weirdest job I've ever had by Melissa
Hands wigged out.
Duh. We all should’ve seen that one coming. The guy was totally weird, but
I guess I really didn’t think he’d freak on Shirley and try to kill her! I
mean, dude. All I can say is thank god for those typing lessons. I can’t
even imagine what would have happened . . .
>> read more
 What
I'm happy about right now by Melissa
Right now I feel happier than I’ve felt in months. Partly because I
smashed a window, which felt a lot better than I ever could have imagined.
>> read more
 Alan
and Brad debate the defense of necessity by Carolyn and Dana
Tell me, Brad--and this is something I've always wondered--how many Hail
Marys are required as penance for hacking off the fingers of a member of
the clergy, and does it vary with the number and location of the digits?
>> read more
Too Sexy
by Bev
Hey, Brad. There I was perusing the latest issue of People at the checkout
counter - you know, their big "Sexiest Man Alive" issue - and guess who they
chose as the "Sexiest Lawyer of 2005"?
>> read more
 How
do you relax after a hard day? a Boston Legal/South Park crossover
ficlet by R. T. Sblock
[excerpt] Denny smiled. "I like that young man. Authoritative,
assertive...reminds me of myself."
Alan rolled his eyes and got up. All of the lawyers stood and left the
conference room. By the time Alan reached his office, Cartman was already
spinning around in his chair.
"Dude! This chair rocks!
>> read more
Departure by Michelle
"He still embodied the calmness of the morning sun, unflinched by the
chaos around him, he sat, absorbed in his space, clinging to the moment
as long as possible, reluctant to succumb to the fast paced meeting
which was about to ensue."
(9 pages; July 6, 2005; pdf)
more >> |
larger image
 Rebel Without a Crew: Life is not a movie
Tales from the Hollywood Guy
I'm Guy. I'm a production assistant at a Hollywood studio. I work for
everyone; therefore, I'm everywhere. These are my
observations. These are also my indictments of the industry. This may
even be a cynical there-but-for-the-grace-of-the-mogul-go-I cautionary
tale. However, this is a work of fiction, a parody... we think.
[excerpt]
"She was on set today. She's been in the industry so long that everyone's got some opinion of her. I met her once at The Whiskey, back when it was painted black."
>> read more
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